part 363 paper snowflakes

[aphanon_meme]

It's... December! I can't believe it's almost the end of another year. Time is weird. Anyway! There's been a lot of neato Hetalia news in the meantime! That game (that I can't get working but will look at videos and screencaps of so I can play vicariously)! The image of the first doll! The musical promo images!! What are you most excited for?

Enjoy part 363!

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Comments

Re: Ask a vuri

[vuri]

Ah yes those are good! :D Especially when there's bondage, as there often is...

"Have you had a bath at any point this lifetime"

"Is that a hickey or a plague sore"

"How many layers are you wearing where the hell is your goddamn dick"

"I don't know how to get it off because I'm not entirely sure what that is or how my valet put it on me in the first place"

Re: Ask a vuri

[bachmanroad]

"Have you had a bath at any point this lifetime"

Nooooo @ because the moment is ruined when they smell crotch and start gagging like, sorry, date's over let's get a servant to run a bath.

Re: Ask a vuri

[vuri]

"I uh... suddenly remembered my vows to the church SORRY LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS. WITH JESUS. WITHOUT TOUCHING."

I guess practically, people would just get used to the odor and the... eugh, texture... and the fleas...

...yeah I just try to pretend like everyone's magically, historically inaccurately clean for any historical clothing fantasies.

Re: Ask a vuri

[bachmanroad]

They be cleaner in 1912/19-20th century if banging in Stuart London is too dirty for you!
I mean then again you would probably crush your organs with the corsets but that's besides the point!

Re: Ask a vuri

[vuri]

It gets worse because I totally have a thing for pirates, soldiers, knights, and basically everybody who would've had the absolute WORST hygiene. I'm attracted to the rough and wild lifestyle, the adventure and danger and fighting, but it's definitely a fantasy that doesn't hold up to close examination. :'D

Re: Ask a vuri

[bachmanroad]

'I'm attracted to the rough and wild lifestyle, the adventure and danger and fighting,'

So what you're saying is, you're attracted to APH Australia. Although I hope his personal hygiene isn't so bad as pirates. :P

Re: Ask a vuri

[vuri]

I think with Australia you should probably be more worried if he accidentally brought any friends with him

Like lol is that a snake in your pants or are you just happy to OH GOD OH FUCK GET IT AWAY WHAT THE FUCK MAN

I mean, I expect he has a basic shower and bathroom facilities in his... I dunno... travel camper thing, or whatnot, right? Hopefully? Maybe?

Re: Ask a vuri

[bachmanroad]

Talk about a ménage à trois! Unless the snake is likes to watch, what a scaly voyeur.

I feel like England brings up his hygiene to knock Australia down several pegs. "You know I had to call the fire department to hose your filthy ass down and you STILL reeked afterwards"

Maybe, or probably he washes himself off in the nearby creek or something, or has it bucket does it all sexy like Hugh Jackman in that one movie.

Re: Ask a vuri

[vuri]

England probably has an annoying habit of reverting to dad-nagging at random. It's like the opposite of daddy kink, it's just boner-killing old man griping and of course he has a rather rose-tinted view of his own parenting so it's all like I RAISED YOU BETTER THAN THIS, IS THIS HOW YOUR ROOM ALWAYS LOOKS, HAVE YOU TESTED THAT KOALA FOR RABIES WELL TEST HIM AGAIN HE LOOKS RABID TO ME, AND YOU CALL THIS TEA, etc

I'm not sure I trust washing in creeks, but hey better than nothing. Besides, sooner or later he'll have to go home and clean up for meetings and nation stuff...

Re: Ask a vuri

[bachmanroad]

Is dad-nagging canon for England? Because I wish it was, that would so be him. Especially to America; why feel ill on the 4th of July when you can seize the opportunity and talking about all the embarrassing things America did while growing up at his birthday party?

I honestly have the feeling England doesn't like Australia's koala and the feelings are mutual. The thing has probably tried scratching his eyes out at least once.

Australia better, that poor prime minister who takes an official photo and grimaces at the last second when smelling his BO.

Re: Ask a vuri

[romanon]

consider possible variant of historical porn: Romans. Romans loved washing almost as much as they loved whores of all sexes. And they loved whores of all sexes a whole lot

or areas under Arab control in the Middle Ages

possible with fascinating, dove-eyed young Arabian prince patiently explaining the ancient tradition of the hammam to red-haired European prince

Re: Ask a vuri

[bachmanroad]

Speaking of Romans you just reminded me, how much of a missed opportunity Rome is to the fandom when regarding smut? Like sex in those pretty and huge Roman baths? Possibly naked shenanigans while in the outside track? (I might be wrong here, but I remember learning out Roman gymnasiums with pictures of nude dudes running laps. Or was that Sparta?)

Plus Rome's like a... DILF, like fandom why aren't you on that?

Re: Ask a vuri

[romanon]

tl;dr: yeah, it is indeed.

The thing about the Romans that I find so weird is that their attitude towards sex is at the same time more straightforward and filthy and much more innocent than ours. For example, nakenedness during sports was just something that happened because people considered it more convenient than sweating through normal clothes - it had no special erotic meaning, though that didn't stop people from ogling the attractive boys, of course.

But yeah, Roman times especially are a huge missed opportunity. You might have some misgivings about the morality of certain attitudes if you were writing serious historical fic, but for writing pretty shiny smut...yeah. You can go with baths, you can go with the gym, you can go with tents in the battlefield, you can go with temple gardens, you can go with gay sex, lesbian sex, orgies, most sex acts you can think of, you can just. Go. And you'd rarely wouldn't find some kind of literary/historical/material proof that the Romans hadn't at least thought about it.

Re: Ask a vuri

[vuri]

THANK YOU GRANDPA ROME ;__;

"In our language we say 'lechuga,' and that means 'you disgust me please get in the goddamn water you filthy animal' and I think that's so beautiful"

After washing he discovers that the red-haired European prince is in fact a blond. There was just that much crap in his hair.

Re: Ask a vuri

[romanon]

I'd read that fanfic. Hell, I'd watch that three-part epic smutty historical movie. Angel, Comte of "and no, dipping it in jasmine-infused mineral oil very much does not count as washing it and yeah I can tell just wash yourself please".